just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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