Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
