At least make sure they are 18
Why
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
