it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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