Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(641): View more from Iowa

FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER

(1-641): View more from Iowa

STOP listening to that song

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(252): View more from North Carolina

I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.

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(650): View more from California

I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(519): View more from Ontario

That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.

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(607): View more from New York

You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick

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(417): View more from Missouri

Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?

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(336): View more from North Carolina

sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.

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