So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
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