at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
