do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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