how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
