I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Randomize
