with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
