I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
