so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
