white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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