I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
You can't motorboat a personality
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
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