yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
My vagina is very pro this idea
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
