all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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