Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
4 words: hood of his car
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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