Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Pooping to opera.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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