went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize