Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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