why didn't you poke me back
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize