How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
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