do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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