party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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