North Korea, Best Korea!
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
then he tried to convert me to islam
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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