I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
