I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
