"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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