Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Enjoy the penises
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
