What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
