oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
you win again, gameday.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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