i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize