Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
