Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
