what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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