Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Everytime we come here you have an ex here.

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(985): Everytime we come here you have an ex here. http://tfl.nu/ev6m

Replies (16) Good night (566) Bad night (1011)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.

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(404): Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are. http://tfl.nu/hb6o

Replies (10) Good night (3646) Bad night (489)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!

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(503): I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!! http://tfl.nu/reo6

Replies (25) Good night (3201) Bad night (815)
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(404): View more from Georgia

i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".

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(404): i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ". http://tfl.nu/tf5y

Replies (388) Good night (41264) Bad night (4222)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.

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(215): I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk. http://tfl.nu/289e

Replies (12) Good night (4796) Bad night (1144)
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(702): View more from Nevada

it was like having sex with a tree stump

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(702): it was like having sex with a tree stump http://tfl.nu/4ao5

Replies (36) Good night (1246) Bad night (6698)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.

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(304): He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight. http://tfl.nu/5vdu

Replies (60) Good night (15298) Bad night (2248)
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(917): View more from New York City

But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.

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(917): But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting. http://tfl.nu/vtlx

Replies (6) Good night (2016) Bad night (632)
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(949): View more from California

Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.

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(949): Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities. http://tfl.nu/bc5t

Replies (14) Good night (1699) Bad night (872)
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(914): View more from New York

Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.

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(914): Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block. http://tfl.nu/om9a

Replies (0) Good night (571) Bad night (342)
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(407): View more from Florida

He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas

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(407): He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas http://tfl.nu/zvf4

Replies (10) Good night (391) Bad night (634)
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(620): View more from Kansas

Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"

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(620): Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner" http://tfl.nu/uhkx

Replies (2) Good night (681) Bad night (286)
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(916): View more from California

I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.

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(916): I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger. http://tfl.nu/3n2g

Replies (2) Good night (611) Bad night (251)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

i can only hope to be on your level one day.

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(215): i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window. (484): i can only hope to be on your level one day. http://tfl.nu/49sg

Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (327)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...

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(508): We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on... http://tfl.nu/xnt1

Replies (4) Good night (616) Bad night (265)

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