i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I fill condoms, not promises.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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