I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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