Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Randomize