I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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