Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
