I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
