So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
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Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
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There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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