There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
