I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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