i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
