hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
the day after is always just damage control
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize