Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.

(678): View more from Georgia

I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home

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(912): I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar. (678): I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home http://tfl.nu/hat9

Replies (14) Good night (1510) Bad night (776)
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(954): View more from Florida

Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?

(1-954): View more from Florida

Hurt me personally.

(954): View more from Florida

Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though

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(954): Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass? (1-954): Hurt me personally. (954): Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though http://tfl.nu/ypmo

Replies (18) Good night (1986) Bad night (480)
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(443): View more from Maryland

a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?

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(443): a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy? http://tfl.nu/2h5u

Replies (32) Good night (764) Bad night (3315)
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(734): View more from Michigan

I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck

(734): View more from Michigan

omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore

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(734): I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck (734): omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore http://tfl.nu/u6lq

Replies (32) Good night (936) Bad night (4014)
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(810): View more from Michigan

you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.

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(810): you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch. http://tfl.nu/47sj

Replies (29) Good night (1203) Bad night (5010)
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(314): View more from Missouri

In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major

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(314): In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major http://tfl.nu/y5g5

Replies (18) Good night (1327) Bad night (5371)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.

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(780): Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance. http://tfl.nu/w65a

Replies (17) Good night (3261) Bad night (780)
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(516): View more from New York

And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.

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(516): And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this. http://tfl.nu/g7ey

Replies (9) Good night (3962) Bad night (991)
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(440): View more from Ohio

I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?

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(440): I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went? http://tfl.nu/9bmv

Replies (8) Good night (5734) Bad night (1075)
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(219): View more from Indiana

My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious

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(219): My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious http://tfl.nu/6jx4

Replies (10) Good night (3768) Bad night (949)
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(518): View more from New York

Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?

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(518): Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation? http://tfl.nu/dtaz

Replies (11) Good night (2238) Bad night (2447)
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(817): View more from Texas

We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.

(1-817): View more from Texas

Braid them armpits, sister.

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(817): We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered. (1-817): Braid them armpits, sister. http://tfl.nu/o7hq

Replies (1) Good night (1350) Bad night (678)
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(812): View more from Indiana

I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.

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(812): I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together. http://tfl.nu/6uns

Replies (3) Good night (1069) Bad night (907)
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(425): View more from Washington

I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.

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(425): I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly. http://tfl.nu/0bgb

Replies (2) Good night (911) Bad night (263)
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(816): View more from Missouri

so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?

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(816): so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet? http://tfl.nu/ne2f

Replies (2) Good night (536) Bad night (245)

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