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• (410): View more from Maryland

  apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.

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• (323): View more from California

  Booty call?

  (310): View more from California

  Dude you don't even follow my twitter

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• (949): View more from California

  I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.

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• (916): View more from California

  I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"

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• (646): View more from New York

  I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.

  (1-704): View more from North Carolina

  I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Dude, you are the most awesome.

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• (641): View more from Iowa

  My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.

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