Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(773): View more from Illinois

you want me

(978): View more from Massachusetts

i'd rather choke on a dick.

Fav 3 1358 1978
share tweet
(650): View more from California

you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"

Fav 18 6086 901
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(856): View more from New Jersey

just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.

Fav 28 8310 1125
share tweet
(250): View more from British Columbia

i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now

Fav 8 1092 4144
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(812): View more from Indiana

through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.

(847): View more from Illinois

ill be there in 5.

Fav 26 9133 1353
share tweet
(636): View more from Missouri

She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome

Fav 9 5407 1192
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards

Fav 11 1273 3129
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(781): View more from Massachusetts

not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.

Fav 2 1391 516
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(407): View more from Florida

Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!

Fav 2 331 81
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT