hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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