Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize